alone

The rain is pouring and she's standing alone.

Midnight has passed some time ago and all she has to keep her company is her scattered thoughts. A crowded room provides no comfort, she sees through the deceptive smiles and the words without substance.

She's so far away from everything that comforts her and she feels as if she needs to go back. It is such a struggle to keep both of her feet in this place when she knows how easily everything could be fixed. Need is such a strong word, but she needs him. Still she prays for one more chance and one more day with a hope of an unanswered prayer. What is meant to stay broken she desires to fix.

The words mean nothing and she desperately tries to grasp the unwanted concept that she was never loved, that love means more than what happened to her. Resentment consumes her.

Her feelings are so empty but contain so much strength. The pain leaks out when she is alone and relief floods over her heart because she knows the pain that she let go will never make itself home in her again. As soon as she rids herself of the building emotion, she acquires more. There is so much to sort through that she refuses to think about. She hides because of the fear that runs her life. Her old way of living is dead but she longs to bring it back to life, even knowing that it will slowly destroy her in the end.

So far away and so alone, everything seems so cold.