new years

This year has been a little rougher than last year.

There is so much that I look back on with disgust. I never knew what pain was until 2012 rolled around, and I liked it that way. God had a purpose behind every event though. God knew I needed to experience more than just a sheltered happiness, I needed to experience a deeper happiness through trials.  He provided me what I needed: pain.

I have learned that not everyone has a red heart, some people have a little more black mixed in. I was so naive coming into 2012. There are some twisted people on this Earth that have completely changed who I am this year. I was a victim, yes, but God made the event beautiful. I have learned to use my pain to help other people with their pain. A scar might be permanent but at least it doesn't remain an open wound forever. The hardest part is learning how to forgive those who have mistreated me.

Despite everything, I stand at the end of 2012 so much happier than I was at the end of 2011. I had such a faulty foundation built and I had become comfortable with that. God tore it all down because He had a much more solid foundation in mind. He has taught me to let go of what has happened and cling to Him instead of the pain. I have built my life around my Father.

This year is going to be full of mending broken relationships, forgiving abusers, loving enemies, and praying often. Tis the season to start over, tis the season for new beginnings.

2013 will not be all about me, it will be all about my God. Without Him, I'd be nothing.