i just wanted to write

I was in a coffee shop the day before a huge chemistry exam wondering why I kept having this tendency to visit my blog every few seconds. Instead of being stressed out to the point of insanity and tears I had a great conversation with my best friend and decided to let every worry be put aside.

Scrolling down through my posts I realized how emotional and direct my blog has been recently. I feel as if this is the place I can release all of the pent up anger and sadness I have harbored over my first semester of college. Sometimes I feel as if everyone carries around a light except me, as if everyone has this positive energy and I'm the odd one out. I have discovered that many words cannot be trusted with many people, because some people are not capable of understanding the deeper meaning behind the phrases I speak.

There is this connection I feel toward putting my heart on this blog for anyone to see, and I'm not sure why. I trust my readers because I do not know them, and they do not know me. There is no rumors or drama or any negative situations. So this website has become my sanctuary and my place to go to when I'm emotionally drained. It's a grand way of making my heart content; writing to an unknown audience and able to release my sometimes dramatic thoughts. This is my outlet, a place where my walls can be let down. And I don't do that very often.

There is really no point to this, I just wanted to write. And I bombed my chemistry exam.